Oblivious to the world
by 666darknessangel666
Summary: Harry loves Draco but doesn't know it yet. what happens if Draco uses harry. read and find out. EDITED PLEASE READ!


i do not own any of these characters that achievement goes to j.k.r

oblivious to The World

Draco Malfoy couldn't sleep so he decided to go up to the astronomy tower and think a while. He didn't know what to do if he didn't do anything he would be killed but he didn't want to kill anybody he most of all didn't want to kill Dumbledore because Dumbledore and potter were the only way he was going to leave the dark side and join the light. Draco didn't know what to do , how to approach them , or even how to make them believe him. When he reached the astronomy tower he saw potter standing there in nothing but jeans looking at the stars talking to himself " I can't tell him he'd just laugh at me and spread it around the school" " but what if he doesn't " " but he will" thats when Draco decided to speak up and said " Tell who what?" Potter spun around with a horrified look on

his face that quickly turned into a shyness and vulnerability that almost made Draco leave right than potter said " i won't even tell my friends why would i tell you were not exactly buddies " Potter said that last part with suprising bitterness. Draco was confused did potter want to be friends or at the least not enemy's? Then potter looked at a spot on the floor behind his leg and said in a tiny voice " Malfoy do NOT move" Draco stood very still and looked down and saw a deadly snake by his leg. Then he heard a sound that went straight to his cock and looked up Potter was staring intently at the snake and talking to it in parsletounge. Draco was relived when the snake went

away until potter said " Malfoy that snake told me it was going to kill you" but Draco was barely listening he noticed that potter was looking anywhere but at him and almost laughed potter oozed innocence. Draco decided it was time to have a little fun and took a step towards potter backing him into a wall. he saw the fear in potters eyes turn into confusion as Draco stepped very close and that looked turned into something that shocked Draco ...Hope. Harry watched as Draco pressed himself against Harry and kissed him. His eyes fluttered closed and he leaned into the

kiss it felt so good so right then Draco pulled away and smirked at Harry. Draco watched as potters eyes fluttered closed then pulled away from the kiss feeling smug that potter was breathing hard and he wasn't. but then he had watched potters eyes zero in on that smirk. watched as they welled up with tears and got a broken look in them. watched as potter ran from the tower. watched as the consequences of what he had done played out. Harry had

run to the nearest bathroom and broke down Draco had broken something inside him something deep. He had known he had feelings for Draco since the year started but until now he didn't know it was love he was well and truly stood dumbfounded staring at the spot where Harry had disappeared and knew that he should be over the moon but all he could feel was sick at himself for what he had done as he walked to the nearest bathroom he heard huge , broken sobs coming from inside and open the door he saw potter on the floor crying and shaking and knew he Draco Malfoy had broken Harry potter to the core. He should be victorious but all he felt was sick. After he had

finished crying he dragged himself up to his bed in Gryffindore tower and fell asleep that night he didn't dream about Voldemort ,Cedric ,or Sirius he had a nightmare about Draco. Harry was in a dark room and the only light was from a lamp on a table filled with pictures of him and Draco. There was him and Draco at their wedding him and Draco holding hands as they walked on a beach and one where Harry was holding a baby girl who had his eyes and

Draco's hair then Draco stepped out of the shadows and said " that's what we could have been , what we would have been. that could have been our daughter but no that's not possible any more" then he grabbed the picture from Harry and ripped it in 2. With every picture he ripped he felt a little more broken, then Draco picked up the last picture it was one with him and Draco in bed wrapped in each others arms as that picture to was torn Harry sobbed out a name that held endless amounts of pain " Draco" . He was still feeling sick with himself for what he had done to potter. Potter had saved his life and what did Draco do to thank him break him to the core. As Draco entered the

great hall and sat next to pansy he searched the great hall for potter who wasn't there yet then started eating. When Harry woke up he felt strangely empty of emotions for someone who's heart had been shattered and wrote about last night in his diary and went to take a shower after his shower he looked at himself in the mirror and saw pale skin, large bags under his eyes , and his emerald-green eyes that had a dull dead look in them like there was

no emotions which there wasn't but to Harry it didn't matter anymore , nothing mattered any more. When potter entered the great hall people stopped talking immediately because he looked like something terrible had happened his pale skin and eyes combined made him look terrible and there was only 2 people in the hall who knew why he looked that way and Draco knew that look was his fault and he could do nothing about it. Harry wasn't listening to Hermione's talk about school or Rons talk about quidditch he was to busy writing in his diary then " Harry are you

okay" he looked up closed his diary on the half-finished entry and said " yes Hermione I'm fine" she looked at him for a second longer and said " are you sure" Harry knew the only way to get her off his back was to make sure there was no loopholes when he answered and them leave he stood up and said " Hermione there is nothing physically or mentally wrong with me i am fine now please stop asking" in a mechanical emotionless voice then left the great hall and headed to potions 10 minutes early. When Draco entered the potions classroom with his friends he saw potter in the corner drawing something in a book that was probably a diary. Draco had changed before he

would have plotted ways to get the diary away from potter and sell it to the daily prophet or the black market on potters stuff that you could buy stuff that potter had used once he had heard Collin Creevy bragging to his brother that he was making a fortune selling the pictures he takes of potter when he's not looking a week after that Draco

had caught the young Weaslett mooning over a picture of a soaking wet potter with a towel around his waist. But now he felt guilty and curious potter hadn't noticed they were in the room yet Draco decided to see what was so important to potter. But when he got a better look he only saw the words / WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN / before potter looked up saw Draco and immediately closed the diary and stuffed it into a box and locked it with a spell that you

had to know the password to open then put it into his bag and looked at his desk. As Draco sat down Pansy said " look at Potter i wonder whats wrong with him" though she said it with a sneer Draco knew she was worried she like Draco was trying to join the light and get out from under her family's shadow. Draco said " he's broken, he's broken and its all my fault" pansy looked at him, cast a silencing spell so only she and Draco could hear the conversation

and said " what the hell did you do" with an accusing glare Draco told her about the snake, the kiss, and how he had broken potter. She looked at him then burst into tears and said " he'll never forgive you ,you broke him, he saved your life and you broke him" and with that she got up and went to sit by potter. potter gave her a strange look that still didn't reach his eyes then shrugged and went back to staring at his desk. Harry watched as Draco and pansy finished their conversation and was surprised when pansy burst into tears and came and sat down beside him but it didn't pull him out of his apathy so he didn't care he shrugged and continued staring at his desk. When class was over pansy leaned in close to Harry and said " potter I know I'm a Slytherin and that were not exactly on

good terms but i need to speak to professor Dumbledore can you do that for me" harry looked at her with dull eyes and nodded then got up and left the room Draco staring at him the whole time. Draco was tired of the stares and whispers that were being directed at potter it had been 2 weeks and potter was still broken the rumors going around were the worst no one got it right there was one that said he was a vampire, one that said he was psychotic, and the one that bugged Draco the most was the one that said he was love-sick but only draco, pansy, and potter knew the truth and none of them were telling. Harry sighed and reached for some more bacon he knew

everyone was staring at him but he didn't care he knew it wouldn't last forever. When he got up and left the room every one went quiet then when he was gone they started talking again. As harry made his way to charms he tripped over his shoelace and fell to the floor and cut his hand on a jagged piece of stone that was sticking from the wall and harry felt alive again the pain cut through his apathy straight to his heart and gave him feelings again when harry healed it though the feelings went away and left him feeling hollow again and he knew he needed to feel that again so he took a detour to the kitchens and grabbed a knife before the house elves saw him he slipped out, hid the knife in his bag, and went about his day. Draco was sitting at breakfast the next morning watching

potter, pansy was still mad at him and hadn't talked to him since last week when she had told him that potter had gotten her a meeting with Dumbledore and that she would not help him get one because " you made your bed and now you have to lie in it" as he watched potter looked around and pulled something out of his bag, put it to his wrist and cut it across when Draco saw the bliss in potters eyes he felt his guilt crush him in a thousand pound grip and as he saw potters eyes flicker to his own he slipped into unconsciousness.  
Harry cut his wrist and felt feeling rush back then Harry's eyes flicked up to meet Draco's just in time to see Draco faint and in that moment he did care but his apathy came back to soon and he couldn't act on his concern. Draco came to in the hospital wing and immediately sat up and saw pansy looking at him worriedly he looked around and

said " he's cutting himself i saw it potter is cutting himself" pansy stared at him a moment then said " this is your fault do you know what happened yesterday we were outside studying and he fell asleep then he woke up shaking and a total of 2 tears fell from his eyes before that dull look came back he had had a dream he had been having a lot lately but he wouldn't tell me what happened in the dream and do you know who was the star of that dream was not Voldemort, his friend Cedric, or his godfather who died last year no it was about you. you will fix this" then she left Draco staring after had known that pansy cared for Harry like a brother and that potter had welcomed her

with open arms but not that they were so close that they studied together. And the sad thing was that could have been Draco. Once he had been proven trustworthy he would have been welcomed to but not now. Now potter was broken and it was his fault. Harry woke up from another dream this one not as bad as some of the others only 5 of the pictures had been ripped before he had woken up but the insults dream Draco spat at him still hurt. Harry counted to 10 and made the shaking stop then got out his knife so he could feel again. healed the cuts wrote in his

diary and slipped off to take a shower. Draco was glad that the gossip about Harry had died down and was laughing with Blaise when it happened he saw potter stand up with that devastated look in his eyes and leave the hall Draco didn't know what was wrong one minute potter was writing in his diary then the next he was rushing out of the hall. Draco hesitated got up and followed him out but before he got 2 steps away from the door he tripped

over a book it was potters diary Draco hesitated then opened the book at random it was the picture potter had drawn in potions. It was a surprisingly accurate picture of him and potter wrapped in each others arms there was an entry next to it Dear Diary You know that saying be careful what you wish for well i know now what it means. Last night i was up at the astronomy tower arguing with my self about how to tell draco the truth without him laughing at me or making a scornful remark when he shows up and hears part of the argument luckily he didn't hear any names and i didn't say anything damaging but then this snake shows up and tells me its gonna kill Draco but i managed to talk it out of it. Draco then backed me into a wall and kisses me it felt so good so right but then i find

out he was just using me so i ran. I broke down crying in a bathroom. I had known i had feelings for him since the beginning of the year but i didn't know they were feelings of love until i knew he would never return them. Then when i went to sleep i had a dream of me in a dark room with a table filled with pictures of me and Draco then Draco stepped out of the shadows and started ripping them insulting me the whole time and then he picks up the last picture and says the one thing that cuts me the deepest " this is what we could have been, What we would have been" then he rips that to and i woke up it was horrible but i didn't feel it i was completely and totally apathetic Harry. Draco felt sick potter had loved him. Draco turned to another random page and read Dear Diary I found a way to feel again yesterday on my way to charms i tripped and cut my hand on a jagged rock and my feelings came back

for a while but when i healed the cut they went away so i snuck into the kitchens and took a knife before the house elves noticed. Harry Draco had wondered how potter had figured out how to feel again and turned another few pages Dear Diary Yesterday morning at breakfast i cut myself and i think Draco saw because he had a look of horror on his face when he fainted so i snuck into the hospital wing in my invisibility cloak pansy told him about my dreams but instead of looking smug he looked guilty and sad it makes me wonder.

Harry Then Draco turned another few pages and read Dear Diary I have decided to end it. Life isn't worth living any more. If anyone finds this don't tell Draco I loved him and please tell Ron and Hermione I'll miss them. Also tell Snape that although i may look like my father I'm only like him on the outside inside I'm my mother but that only shows through my eyes and that if he wasn't so blinded by hate he would see that. I have a diary for every year of my life since i turned 6 they are locked in a the small metal case in my trunk the password is Gone But Not Forgotten it is a tribute to my parents, Sirius, Cedric, And every one else who was killed by Voldemort or his deatheaters.

Good-by The soon to be Boy - Who - Didn't - Live Harry James Potter Draco was crying which was something he hadn't done since he was 3. He jumped up and ran back into the great hall and shoved the book into Pansy's hand and told her to read it. Everyone was staring Draco Malfoy was crying and yelling at pansy Parkinson to read the

thing that made him cry it was to weird then when Pansy was done she to started crying and the both ran out of the hall leaving the book on the table everyone staring at it like it had the plague but one brave Ravenclaw said " well aren't we going to find out what is wrong" then she went over and picked it up and read the front cover " The Diary Of Harry James Potter" She the turned it to the page Pansy had left it on and read it out loud by the end most people were crying Snape looked shocked Ron and Hermione had run from the hall after the first 2 sentences not

caring what the rest said and the Slytherins were sitting there shocked they had thought the boy - who - lived arrogant and stupid but now they didn't know what to think. So when people started running from the hall they followed. Harry was at the top of the tower staring at the ground so far away and getting ready to jump when the door burst open and someone screamed "Harry no!" Draco and Pansy were just in time potter was just about to

jump when they burst in he heard pansy scream " Harry no!" but he didn't care potter was an inch away from that ledge and if he fell Draco would die to because in that second he realized he loved potter back so he stepped onto the tower and said " Potter get away from the ledge" Potter didn't even flinch though he did look up with the dullest look in his eyes that Draco now knew was a protection his mind had developed to keep potter from the pain then potters friends burst into the tower and saw potter they started pleading with potter to come away from the ledge though they were doing a very bad job they were saying things like " Harry, Malfoy isn't worth

throwing your life away" or " don't be stupid your needed to fight Voldemort" and with every word potters foot edged closer to the ledge and the dull look got worse and Draco knew he had to do something or he would lose potter before he even had him so he turned to potters friends and said " stop you are not helping insulting the thing he loves isn't going to help and neither is reminding him of you - know - who so just shut up and let me handle it" it was then that Draco noticed that the rest of the school was there and knew that wouldn't help either but knew

they wouldn't leave so he just sighed and turned back to potter who was staring at the ground again and said " potter im sorry" but potter didn't even look up this time though he did stop edging his foot toward the ledge and the dull look cleared just the tiniest bit Draco took this as the sign to keep talking and said " i didn't know. it was wrong yes even if you hadn't loved me but i wouldn't have done it if I had known" potter looked up then and a little pain was entering his eyes even though it was just a flicker Draco kept talking" I've been feeling so guilty since that

night did you know that i followed you to that bathroom and saw you it was then that i realized that I had broken you and it felt terrible to know that it was my fault" then potter took the tiniest step back and Draco felt hope but to get potter off that ledge he would have to do something desperate so he said " Pott... Harry i love you back" And Draco saw the dull look leave Harry's eyes to be replaced by a look that broke Draco's heart to know he had put it there but then Harry said " But you can't i saw you smirk " in a voice that made Draco cringe it was filled with pain,

hope, and desperation Draco said " at the time yes it was a smirk and it lasted until you ran from the room after that i felt sick at myself for what I had done please don't jump i love you" Harry was in Draco's arms in a flash crying and shaking. Harry was crying Draco had said he loved him and meant it to it felt so good to feel Draco holding him loving him then Harry noticed that the whole school was there and almost every one was crying even the Slytherins

but what surprised Harry the most was that Snape was crying to and that Dumbledore was holding the case his diaries were kept in but then Draco whispered something that just made him cry harder and clutch himself closer to Draco. Draco whispered" what we always will be" in Harry's ear and felt Harry press himself closer to Draco and Draco smiled then pansy came over and hugged Harry to then Harry's friends came over and hugged him to though there was a slight hesitation on Weasley's part because of the slytherins there but in the end there was a group hug around Draco and Harry. When Draco felt Harry stop shaking and his crying die down to the occasional sob he loosend his hold on Harry a little not really noticing that almost every one had drifted back to the great hall I didn't

matter that much to Draco when he had Harry in his arms then Dumbledore came over and handed Harry his diaries and said " When you two are ready i would like to talk to you in my office it doesn't have to be today or even tomorrow but it does have to be soon" Draco nodded and Dumbledore left leaving Ron, Hermione, pansy, and Draco with Harry. Draco just glared at them silently daring them to say one thing about what just happened and set Harry off again but that glare was wasted on Ron who said " mate why the hell would you waste your life over Malfoy" and Harry sat up so fast he nearly fell over and said " well Ronald " The clouds around the astronomy tower were roiling and you could see how angry Harry was "it's like this shut the hell up you have no right to judge me" pansy and Hermione started edging away from Ron they knew what sometimes happened when Harry lost control of his

magic and judging by Ron's panicked look so did he. Draco sensing the danger shot a glare at Weasley and grabbed Harry in a hug and started frantically whispering in his ear trying to calm Harry down and it almost worked to until Ron opened his mouth and said " whats your deal it's just Malfoy" and every one cringed Hermione and pansy backed up as far from Ron as possible but nothing happened to Ron nothing at all Harry just sat there staring at Ron with a terrible look in his eyes hate mixed with sadness and anger but Harry just said " if he is 'just Malfoy' then

you are just Weasley to me from now on you don't understand and you probably never will we are no longer friends on the Hogwarts express you were my first friend but Draco is my first love and if you can't accept him then i can't accept you sorry" and with that Harry turned his face into Draco's chest once more leaving Weasley looking stricken

and guilty so he just got up and left Hermione and pansy glaring at him the whole way. When Draco felt Harry start shaking again he felt like getting up and killing Weasley but knew if he left Harry like this he would probably lose him forever so he just hugged Harry close and whispered comforting words in his ear. Harry missed Draco already but it was against Hogwarts rules for a student from a different house to sleep in a with students from other houses as

Harry fell asleep he felt hope for the first time in a long time. Harry was dreaming about Draco they were on the astronomy tower and Draco was holding Harry close saying how much he loved Harry but then Draco suddenly let Harry go and said " you are so naïve do you really think i could ever love you you're a freak everyone you love dies your friends and family are or will be dead and it's all you fault even you aunt and uncle know that and there muggles besides i just wanted to humiliate you in front of the school and now that that can be crossed off my to do list you have no further use" and with that Draco pushed Harry off the astronomy tower Harry woke up seconds

before impact. Ron awoke to Harry crying and shaking he had gone to Hermione and begged her to help him she had agreed but only if he would help her he had agreed desperate when he had been on the astronomy tower surrounded by Harry's anger he had thought Harry would kill him so he had tried to calm Harry down but apparently what he said wasn't the best thing to do because Hermione and pansy backed up far away from him and even Malfoy had gotten a panicked look and cringed but Harry didn't do any thing but stare at Ron and then cut him to the bone with words that made Ron realize just how badly he had messed up. As he sent his patronus to wake Hermione because boys couldn't go up to the girl dormitories he sat in the common room and thought about that look in Harry's eye when he had said those things hatred, sadness, and anger that was what it was. Hermione woke up to see a silver dog sitting on her chest when it saw she was awake it bark softly and tugged at her sleeve

Hermione recognized it as the signal to get the secret weapon and nodded when the dog saw her nod he blinked out of existence. Hermione sent Ron to check on Harry but warned him not to get to close as it would probably not help and when Ron came back down looking grave followed by the rest of the dorm except Harry she started explaining why Harry was crying again " it's because Harry is a pessimist big time and when Harry's pessimism mixes with his subconscious bad things happen you see any little good thing that happens in his life is then tortured by his subconscious it's all because of his family they treat him like a freak who doesn't deserve to live although they do feed him. And his pessimism comes from the wizarding world because here every bad thing that can happen usually happens so mix his pessimism and his subconscious together and you get misery and disbelief". She then revealed

the secret weapon and said " this is the secret weapon it is the only thing that could help right now and pray that it does or most likely nothing would keep him from that ledge again. Harry heard someone come over to him and closed his eyes he didn't want to see the pity on there face so he was surprised when someone wrapped there arms around him and pulled him close and said " shhh I'm here now I love you and always will shhh". Harry looked up into Draco's face in wonder and astonishment feeling better already maybe Draco did love him. When Draco saw the look in Harry's eyes his heart sobbed and he hugged Harry close whispering soothing things in his ear then

when Harry looked at him in wonder he laughed a little and hugged Harry closer. Then Draco decided to prove his love leaned down and kissed Harry softly at first but then the kiss deepened and Harry moaned his tears had stopped by now Draco silently asked Harry for permission to enter by passing his tounge against Harry's lips in answer Harry opened his mouth with another moan and Draco entered with his own moan Harry tasted like chocolate and blueberries and smelled like mint Draco broke the kiss to pull Harry's shirt off and then started kissing

again running his hands over Harry's chest again and again as Harry moaned into his mouth sending vibrations down to his cock making Draco moan back as he explored Harry's mouth with his tounge. Harry thought this is what heaven must be like Draco was kissing him while he ran his hands over Harry's naked chest Draco taste like vanilla and strawberries and smelled like oranges harry moaned again when Draco pressed their erections together and

grinded into him although Harry had almost no experience except for kissing Cho last year he didn't even wank he knew that this would probably get to that point soon but it felt to good to stop so he just broke a way and removed Draco's shirt and started kissing again. Draco felt harry pull away and was disappointed until harry removed Draco's shirt and started kissing him again suddenly Draco had an idea and started kissing his way down to Harry's chest till

he got to a nipple and sucked it into his mouth then harry made the most delicious noise that let Draco know he had found a sensitive spot so he sucked harder making harry cry out again and Draco smiled and continued down to Harry's navel and licked around it then plunged his tounge in making harry arch his back so Draco did it again but this time sucked on it making harry arch again and looked into Harry's lust filled eyes and winked before moving between Harry's legs and unzipping his trousers harry was breathing very heavy now his eyes glazed over with lust as Draco pulled his pants down and blew on the head of his cock he arched and came hard and Harry's first orgasm

made him blackout for a couple of seconds before he came to again a couple of seconds late and saw Draco's amused smile and blushed but Draco just grabbed his flaccid penis and pumped it to hardness again then he did something that made harry see stars he sucked harry into his mouth. Draco was amused you would have thought that to be Harry's first orgasm but it couldn't be as harry opened his eyes Draco started pumping Harry's penis to hardness again and when it was he sucked it into his mouth and smiled at the look on Harry's face then he started

moving his tounge up and down Harry's cock as harry moaned again Draco was glad for the privacy and silencing charm around Harry's bed. Draco then started deep throating harry as harry moaned again Draco sucked harry to the root then still sucking pulled back up harry cried out and came a second time. Harry felt sated but new that he should finish Draco off so he turned onto his stomach and moved between Draco's legs and started sucking him in

return harry knew they would go no further than this till he was ready and that was fine with him he tried to imitate Draco as much as possible having almost no experience at this but what he lacked in talent he made up for in enthusiasm. Draco moaned as harry sucked him he could tell that harry had never done this before just by the way harry moved but that was fine with Draco they would go no further until harry decided to but that didn't stop him from hoping that day would come faster. Then harry did something that had Draco coming in Harry's mouth. As they both lay there sated Draco watched as Harry's earlier fears came back and hugged him close saying " I will always love you no matter what" harry smiled at him and gave him a kiss they fell asleep then oblivious to the world.


End file.
